Eggshells
17 October, 2022



"If we do not feel free to say what's on our minds, then what are we doing."
I had not yet hit 'send' or a different perspective dawned on me.

The infamous Dutch directness, or rudeness, as foreigners tend to call it, is not alien to me. However, I think of myself as a modest, private person who is considerate of others. Who never comments on public news sites, and more generally does not necessarily needs to hear her own voice. I don't know why* in this particular relationship, and towards this particular person, I always feel the need to speak out. I should feel at liberty to say anything that’s on my mind, and he should too, because otherwise the friendship is unworthy and flawed. But is it? Isn't it precisely a sign of friendship to spare each other, to just ignore some things, to let go of them, biting your tongue if needed? To choose to keep communication going, rather than frustrate it? To do so requires empathy and understanding of the other person, and the willingness to put their interests above your own. It doesn't sound as if such a relationship is unworthy or flawed.

*Yes, you do know why.

Pictures taken in Öregrund, Sweden, and somewhere in the Basilicata region, Italy.